Split, Croatia

A few weeks back at our Remote Year Orientation the program leaders had us write a postcard to our future self.  I really like that idea, but didn’t have time or space to give it the consideration it warranted.  I quickly tried to come up with some insightful words of wisdom, then tried to squeeze them onto a small postcard, and the net result is something I don’t really remember, save to know I was dissatisfied. Fortunately for me (and sadly for you), I’ve got a blog.  I decided to revisit the exercise and put a little more thought into it and take you along for the journey.  Yay!  So here we go, a letter to my future self – me after 12 months of Remote Year.

Still working on that perfectionist thing, are we?

– inner critic

Dear Brian (of 2018),

First things first, congratulations on making it through Remote Year!  What a crazy, awesome, wild fucking year, right?  I know!  Well, I don’t know, but I’m assuming.   You survived!  With all 10 fingers and 10 toes, no less (right?!?), and only a little more gray hair.  Have you told mom and dad about that tattoo yet? Oh, really? (kidding!  or am I…?) I know what you’re thinking…You’re welcome.  Yes, I know, you couldn’t have done it without me.  Oh, stop gushing, yes, I do realize how brave / awesome / cool I am.  Yes, I know how mundane and ordinary your life would be if not for me.  Well, ok, maybe just a little more… no?  Oh, ok, uhm… on to bigger and better things.

So now what, you’re wondering?  Well, future me, as your younger, better-looking, less-experienced self, let me give you some advice.  One word: detox.  If the rest of the year looked anything like the first month, then you might want to look into a cleanse…  Just sayin.

Something a little more helpful and sage?  Oh… how about this: go confidently and boldly forward.  Don’t look back and don’t try to hold on to this experience too tightly.  You know that’s what you tend to do.  This amazing adventure is now behind you – a very fond, very vivid memory, but moving forward is harder when you’re looking backward.  Go forward to the adventures that lie ahead, know that this amazing year will propel you into greater and more exciting things.  If you try to hold on too tightly, it will weigh you down.  It will close you off from new opportunities, and leave you longing for what was.  It will occupy you with trying to recreate something that can’t be recreated.  That’s not good for you, and it’s not good for those around you.  I mean really, who likes to be around someone who’s constantly pining for the good ol’ days?  Let them be the good ol’ days, and go create some awesome new days.

Yes, I know what you’re thinking, but stop it.  The days ahead can absolutely be filled with just as much community and fun and adventure.  Who’s to say it’s not possible?  Yes, I know, but is that the voice you really want to listen to?  Look back 2 years, then 1 year, now look at where you are today.  Would you have imagined this 2 years ago?  (hint: no).  Can I imagine where you are right now?  (hint: nope).  So stop assuming you know what lies ahead.  Remember that thing we’ve been working on?  Just trust…  It has served us well thus far.  Listening to that other voice? Not so much.

Wait… are you talking about me?

– inner critic

Oh, and another thing… Stop trying to figure it all out – it’s just a big waste of time and energy. This is a huge transition, and if you’re anything like me, you’re trying to decipher it. Understand it. Analyze it. We got here, we joined RY by knowing what we wanted, finding what we sought and trusting it would all work out.  And it worked out pretty well, didn’t it?  So trust.  Trust that it will continue.  Trust that your Mangata family, while not as close in proximity, will still be with you.  Trust that what lies ahead is equally as exciting and fulfilling as what lies behind.  Find that other inner voice, the quieter one that lead you here.  Don’t be afraid to sit still for a moment and listen; stop overthinking it – just listen.  And when you’re ready for what’s next it will be clear.  Remember back to how it felt when you found Remote Year.

This, I think, is the pearl.  Remember how natural it felt when you came across Remote Year.  Remember the certainty you had when you applied.  Remember the ease with which you said yes, and how simple it was to let everything go and step into that opportunity.  Remember how everything falls into place when it is right.  Find that small voice again, listen to it, and things will align once again as you move forward.  Perhaps re-read the Alchemist.

When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.

– Paul Coelho, The Alchemist

Hey, you!  I see what you’re doing.  I see your eyes drifting from the screen to stare off into the distance.  I see that glazed look you get.  I know you’re starting to retreat into your head and reminisce; ponder; daydream.  We’re not done yet; eyes down here.  Come on… yup, that’s it.  You’ll have plenty of time later to drift and pontificate, for now keep reading.  I’m almost done.

While you’re pausing, this is the perfect time to spend a moment taking stock.  You didn’t do this on your own.  You didn’t get where you are without the community of friends and family you stepped away from a year ago.  You left a loose end that could use some revisiting.  You left friends going through their own challenges and transitions.  This is the perfect opportunity to reconnect with those who helped launch this wild dream, and turn it into a reality.  Those who were there for you at the bottom.  I’m sure you kept in touch with everyone while you were on the road, and I’m sure you stayed curious about their lives.  Go find out what they’ve been up to for the past year.  And be open and surprised when you discover it was no less exciting and amazing than your year.

Oh, and while you’re taking stock… why not take another pass through your storage unit to see how much of what remains you really want to keep.  You survived a year without any of that stuff.  Did you miss it?  Remember that post about stuff?  Maybe you should give it a re-read and take your own advice.

Finally, it seems so simple, but it’s not.  Think back to why you pursued this.  Back to what your motivation was when this all began.  Remember all those moments in this past year when you stopped… looked around… and said this is my life.  Those connecting points; moments where you paused and took stock.  Treasure those.  Treasure the experiences, the connections and the memories.  Feel it.  Close your eyes and be here, right now, in this moment.  This is another connecting point.

And for fuck’s sake, write that shit down.  Because we all know how terrible your memory is.

PS – I noticed your blog cursing has drastically decreased from the first post… I think you need to pick that back up!!

– Jeff “the truthsayer”

Adios.  (I’m assuming you’re fluent in Spanish by now because surely you’ve been practicing… right?)

And, dear reader, since you made it this far, I’ll share a few more pictures from my time in Croatia.  We have some from my day of Ziplining and exploring Omis, and a few randoms from Split.  Ziplining was a blast, and may turn into its own post… we’ll see.